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Nick Arden's avatar

While I appreciate the logic and science behind the reaction to appreciation, Mardy, I wonder if there may be something deeper in the reason for that reaction. When someone expresses appreciation for something that you have done, it indicates that you have made a positive difference in that person's life. In doing so, in some small way, it confirms the value of your life - something that may live on after you are gone. (Or is that just a feeling specific to an atheist?)

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks for weighing in on this week's theme, Nick. I think the feeling would be the same, regardless of one's theological beliefs.

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Nick Arden's avatar

When you talk about "life's saddest realities", I am reminded of an incident with my father, a deeply troubled man who had difficulty expressing deep emotions. I had just received the letter announcing that I had qualified for a place at Cambridge University. my longtime goal. I was ready for at least a week of celebration (and admittedly being told many times how great I was). All I got was a hug, and the words "I knew you would do it"!

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

A very sad story, Nick. Thanks for sharing. Clearly, your father was "appreciation-deficient." Hope you were able to thrive in spite of it.

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Michael's avatar

Mardy, this Thursday our hearts will be beating with yours in appreciation. A favorite quote on this subject is by Michael Korda. “Let’s face it--what we all want is to know that somebody out there thinks we’re special, maybe even desirable.” Because of one of your posts last November, I began corresponding with Arlene in Turkey. We haven’t missed a day of chatting since then. My appreciation for her has grown into affection. Your reach crosses oceans and you deserve lasting appreciation.

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Michael. Love that Korda quote. If you have a source, please pass it along. I also love that you and Arlene have connected in part as a result of my efforts.

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Sharon Joseph's avatar

Mardy, I pray that the Great physician will be present in the operating suite to guide the hands and minds of the gifted physicians who will perform your procedure this week. I pray for your speedy recovery. I also wanted to express my deep appreciation for the wonderful gift your words and posts have provided in my life for so many years!! In a world where forces for good are in short supply, you are a voice of comfort, challenge and positive change! Thank you! Thank you! I look forward to next week’s post!

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks, my dear Sharon. My heart is warmed by your kind words. When I'm lying on that table this week, it will be nice to know that you--and so many others--will be with me in spirit.

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John's avatar

Well Mardy, Your positive attitude speaks volumes about you and, I believe, will definitely improve your recovery after Thursday. All the best for a speedy one. I’m looking forward to your next column already. Thinking of you, John.

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks, John. I've always been a positive person, so I see no need to abandon that trait now. I'm also looking forward to pressing the "Send" button next Saturday night!

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Stephen Rockower's avatar

My son, while leaving his job, was feted with appreciation from the people he worked with. He commented, "It's like being at your own funeral"!

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks, my friend, that was helpful. My own experience these days is perfectly captured by your son's comment.

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Scot Yeager's avatar

Mardy, your posts are amazing and this weeks is my favorite.

I want to share this post with every contact I have because I believe as you noted, “When one person expresses deep appreciation to another person, two people end up feeling better about themselves.”

I’m glad your event is being done sooner than later and I hope you have a speedy recovery.

I’m glad you’re in good hands with Kathrine.

Thanks so much for all you do, I really mean it

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks for your kind words, Scot. I'm blessed to have wonderful subscribers like you in my world.

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Dr Michael J Wagner's avatar

Having gone "under the knife" myself, I want to alert and focus you on one of life's smallest pleasures: There is about a second and a half of euphoria just as the sedative has been injected into your shunt, and begins making its rounds. Look forward to it, grab it, and hang on. It's yo😁urs . . . just for a moment. I confided that to an intern who was about to inject me with whatever concoction they used just then, and he said, "Oh yeah. We all use this on New Year's eve!" Good luck. I wish you many endorphins.

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks, my friend, I'm looking forward to the rush!

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Jane Godin's avatar

All the best for your upcoming surgery❤️🌹

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks, Jane, I appreciate your emotional support.

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Jack Altschuler's avatar

When asked about my leadership workshops and keynotes, just saying "leadership" often seemed to leave my questioner with a "Huh?" look, so I would explain. My sessions were about coaching leaders so that those looking to them for leadership wouldn't say, "My boss is a jerk." That got through.

I used your William James quote at every presentation. It commonly brought gravitas to the meeting, as the leaders in the room often realized how infrequently they voiced appreciation or even remembered to say "thank you." Leadership is just a specific kind of relationship and for most of us that is about being human with others. It's all too easy in this fast paced world to forget to do that.

So, my friend, I wish you the best of outcomes from your upcoming surgery. The song says ya gotta have heart and I know that you do. May this tune up keep you ticking right along.

And thanks for including my quote!

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks for weighing in on the theme, my friend, It was truly my pleasure to feature your quote; I loved it from the moment I first saw it!

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Jack Altschuler's avatar

I omitted the most important part: I appreciate you.

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks. And I you!

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Kathy McGougan's avatar

Wishing you well this week as you undergo your procedure! Hope you have an easy and very speedy recovery! You really do make a positive difference in the world with your wonderful writing and all of your interesting weekly newsletters. Sending you and Katherine all my best. 💗

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks for kinds words, Kathy. On Thursday, that operating room will be filled with the spirits of a lot of people!

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ethel lee-miller's avatar

Wishing you well this coming week. Sending strength, resilience, and care to you.

Wisdom and patience to your medical staff

Humor and confidence to all

One of your many fans,

Ethel Lee-Miller

Life loves to be taken by the lapel and told, “I’m with you, kid. Let’s go."

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks for your words of encouragement, Ethel. It’s nice to know I’m in your thoughts. Thanks also for that Maya Angelou quotes; one of my favorites!

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Barbara E's avatar

So wonderful to read about all the appreciation headed your way. You totally deserve it!! Sending healing thoughts and a hug!!

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks, my dear Barbara. Just got the hug, and it felt great!

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Julayne Hughes's avatar

Just a note on a statement in the Puzzler section: "he would later go on to write hundreds of songs, but only one is remembered today." The show's theme song is certainly best remembered, but there are several of his songs that were used in the show. Some examples are "You've Got to Do It," "It's Such a Good Feeling," "It's You I Like," and "What Do You Do With the Mad That You Feel." I'd be willing to bet that many people who watched the show during childhood remember these songs as well.

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks for weighing in, Julayne. You are correct. I probably should have written, "but only one has gone on to achieve lasting fame."

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Herman Axelrod's avatar

It is heartening to read about the many who appreciate you and are concerned about your health. Those tributes are justified by your thoughtfulness in the content of each week's theme. Keep your faith and take care.

Herman

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks, Herman. This whole procedure has certainly reminded me of the many friends and supporters I'm blessed to have.

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