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David Snapper's avatar

Dr. Mardy,

Courage dares open doors closed in fear.

Four times this past month I spent long hours with men teetering on the threshold of eternity.

Your post contains much wisdom.

A wise person opens the door while still young, prepares for the future, and has no fear when the door is opened one more time.

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks for weighing in, David. All very well said!

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John Smithson's avatar

Ten excellent tips. Did these all come from personal experience? I'm curious as to the source.

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks, John. Yes, all come from personal experience, including some I've learned a lot from--and, of course, some I'd rather forget!

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Michael's avatar

Mardy, Thanks for your additional wise words on aging. Some of the wisest words come from older persons. Two examples. Lady Nancy Astor at age 80 said, "I used to dread getting older because I thought I would not be able to do all the things I wanted to do. But now that I am older, I find that I don't want to do them." Symphony conductor Pierre Monteux on his 89th birthday said, "I still have two abiding passions. One is my model railway, the other---women. But, at the age of of 89, I find I am getting just a little too old for model railways."

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arlene's avatar

haaaaaaa... I know a guy who's headed that way too!!! Why doesn't it apply to women as well? I never did have a passion for toys!!

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks, Michael. Both of those were terrific!

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arlene's avatar

Hi again Dr. Mardy, this week's newsletter was like fireworks. Almost every quote and line set off a 'flash' and pulled my attention in another direction!! It has inspired me to try something with Pebble Pal creations. I was trying to give them to people in exchange for a donation to be used to buy food for street animals, we have a lot of street dogs in town...but this culture doesn't do that kind of 'donating'. For a few years since retiring, I've been making these 'sculptures' from found materials (mostly pebbles and driftwood) and I'm running out of room in the house and studio. I'm loving this idea....I plan to leave a few around town, in obvious places. I will put a little note attached that says "If you are the first one to find this, take it, it's yours. Give it a good home and enjoy it." I'll get such a 'tickle' out of it and that's how I get to actualize MY passion and stay young.

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks for your heartwarming words, Arlene. Very well expressed.

As the proud owner of one of your Pebble Pals, I think that is a wonderful idea. It nicely combines two tips: passion and kindness!

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Bob's avatar

Fantastic newsletter. The ' organ recital' expression was spot on. This will help stop me from the negative habit of broadcasting my health concerns to others ( and them doing the same to me) Hopefully have conversations where I feel better afterwards rather than worse!

Thank you for your inspirational words every Sunday.

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks so much, Bob. I appreciate your kind words. And thank Ann Landers for that amazing "organ recital" creation!

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Manisha's avatar

Great advice and quotes Mardy! I liked yours the best. To age well, you must live well!

FYI - The market for nonalcoholic drinks is growing, they expect it to be a billion dollar industry. It is attributed to the increase (legalization) of CBD.

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks so much, Manisha. I'm honored. I hadn't even thought about non-alcoholic drinks. Thanks for adding that to the mix.

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Scot Yeager's avatar

I love this post, will comply, share and promote for as long as I can.

I look forward to Mardy’s weekly posts and I’m amazed at what he produces.

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks for for heartwarming words, Scot. I love it when people credit my newsletter with helping them to lead better lives!

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Scott Talbot's avatar

What a wonderful look at an important and challenging topic! There is wisdom here. May I suggest one more tip? Plan well for what comes next (i.e., when old age culminates in death and the ending of this life).

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks so much, Scott. And thanks for that additional tip. Much to think about there.

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Jack Altschuler's avatar

Mardy, your final offering says it all: it's about living well. Bulls eye.

Saroyan's quote captures the time in our lives when we all knew we would live forever. Aging has a way of delivering a quite different perspective and changing what we "know."

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks, Jack. I'm especially pleased that you like my final thought. That Saroyan quote has been a favorite for almost fifty years. Also loved your final thought.

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Dr Michael J Wagner's avatar

I woke up with 2 thoughts today: 1. Where did I put my good body? This one sucks. And 2. I want to shed 35 years. Not pounds. Years!!

I insist on my right to be a curmudgeon Mardy. A sense of humor and a sense of irony help.

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks, Mike. Many others work up with the same thoughts today. And, to clarify, a sense of humor and irony don't just help, they may be essential!

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Patricia Yorton's avatar

Speaking of "organ recitals" (thank you, Ann Landers!), my spine has become the dictator of any kind of effective exercise...one of the more important tips on Effective Aging. Nevertheless, I've tried to cut down discussing my bodily ailments as nobody really wants to know the answer to "How are you?" I'm enjoying all these Tips on Effective Aging." Never too old to learn.

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks for weighing in, Pat. Sorry to hear about the spine issues. And thanks for the kind words.

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Bruce Bragg's avatar

Hey Dr. Mardy, really enjoyed reading your post. Just wanted to let you know you have two number 3's in today's post which actually makes a total of seven instead of 6. Don't know if that was on purpose

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks for your kind words, Bruce. I thought more people would notice, but so far, only you and one other person noticed the error. Clearly, it was not on purpose. I've corrected things in my archives--and even had to change to title to "Seven More Tips for Effective Aging."

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David B.'s avatar

From Anne Lamott's latest essay in her "A User's Guide to Aging," published in The Washington Post:

I know now that everyone is screwed up to some degree, and that everyone screws up. Phew. I thought for decades it was just me, that all of you had been issued owner’s manuals in second grade, the day I was home with measles. We are all figuring it out as we go. Aging is grad school.

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks, David. Love Anne Lamott! A rare purveyor of humor-laced wisdom!

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David B.'s avatar

I just sent you this latest essay.

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks, my friend.

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Dave's avatar

Re #5 - In addition everyone needs a Health Care Power of Attorney (in NC this can be combined with or separate from Advanced Directive) and HIPAA releases (so your health care agent can access your medical records). In NC, body disposition instructions go in the HCPOA, especially important if you want to be cremated. A financial (durable) power of attorney is needed too so your agent can handle your financial affairs when you are unable to do so. Also, in the no mess left category make sure your agent in your financial POA and your executor in your will know how to easily access information about your accounts including what's coming to you electronically and how to access it.

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks for adding that helpful piece of information, Dave.

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Dave's avatar

You’re welcome. And I should add that the best way to do all these documents is to see an attorney who does Elder Law or Estate Law.

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Yes, that's how we did it--and it was relatively simple.

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Barbara E's avatar

More excellent advice. Much to think about and act upon! Thank you so much.

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

Thanks, Barbara. Generally, everything I advise others to do helps me more than anyone!

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Bruce Bragg's avatar

Didn't mean to criticize. Just thought you should know about it. Keep up the great work

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Dr. Mardy Grothe's avatar

I certainly didn't take it as criticism; just helpful and important feedback!

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